Love Letters: Should You Only Date College Graduates?

Fellas, here’s a freebie for you in the eternal battle for a healthy relationship – support your mate in everything she does.

Most of you know my beautiful wife, who founded the predecessor of this very blog. Since then, she’s continued her mission of providing support and encouragement for women writers. Earlier this month, she took things to the next level with See Jane Write Magazine, an online hub for women looking to break into writing, who want to hone their skills or just hang out.

The site is pretty amazing, and she built a lot of it herself. She literally taught herself Web design on the fly.

But don’t just take my word for it. Go visit seejanewritemagazine.com. I’ll wait.

Remember, when your partner shines, so do you. Play a part in making their dreams a reality.

But y’all didn’t come here for the mushy stuff, you came to see me complain about people’s love lives. Here’s how you can get in on the fun.

Send your inquiries to edward@soulinstereo.com, or find me on twitter @etbowser. Just provide your initials, or a fun nickname.   

Here’s today’s question:

Do you think it’s snobby if a man or a woman has a degree and refuses to date someone who doesn’t have a degree?

Looking for higher learning

A couple of years ago, I answered a question from a person who wondered if it was OK to date someone who practiced a different religion. That gave me a chance to turn into Mr. Edward, Bible Study Teacher.

Coincidentally, Bible Study Edd and Music Reviewer Edd often wear the same scowl.

Anyway, I talked about the concept of being equally yoked, which means that both people in the relationship must be moving in the same direction, at the same pace, at the same time, to progress smoothly. That concept holds true for education too.

Sort of.

When it comes down to it, a degree is nothing a but a very expensive sheet of paper that will keep you in debt for ages. Thanks, America.

But what makes that degree valuable are the experiences that lead up to the day you receive it. Paper is paper. Experiences mean so much more.

If you’re a college graduate and in the working world, it’s natural for you to want to connect with a person who shares that same mindset. But a degree doesn’t guarantee maturity, playa. I know plenty of 35-year-old college graduates who are still living like they’re 19. You know the type, sagging their skinny jeans and only getting before noon when the new Jordans are released.

It’s not a good look.

I think what you’re looking for isn’t a partner with a degree. It’s a partner with maturity, goals and a future. A degree doesn’t guarantee that. Focus more on a person’s drive and commitment to your relationship rather than what’s hanging on the wall.

Question Numero Dos.

Why is it that a man will date a woman for a long period of time, she goes through the ups and the downs with him and he in turn marries another woman that he has only known for a hot second?

KJ

So let me get this straight. Sometimes it takes me a minute to process the tales of the hood.

So a man has been dating woman No. 1 for an eternity, he breaks up with her and marries woman No. 2, but No. 1 is salty because, clearly, she wanted to marry him ages ago and he wouldn’t commit?

Why did No. 1 let him hang around all that time if he wouldn’t Beyonce her left ring finger?

I know it’s easy for me to see these things because I’m outside of the realm of the relationship but ladies, you gotta start paying attention to clues. If you’ve been trying to wed a guy for ages and he makes no effort to Electric Slide you down the aisle, HE DOESN’T WANT TO MARRY YOU. I don’t know the reasons why, but it’s pretty apparent he doesn’t want to take that step.

Y’all know I despise ultimatums but you have to do what’s best for you. If you want to advance the relationship and he doesn’t, it goes back to that unequally yoked thing. It’s not going to work.

If you don’t pay attention to the signs and move on, he’ll do it for you.