Edd’s MANtra: Derrty Politics

October 19, 2010Edward BowserEdd's MANtra, music, TV0

Did anyone check out BET’s Top 10 Rappers of the 21st Century last week?

Instead of airing Soul Plane on a continuous loop, it seems like BET is following Vh1’s lead and instead of coming up with original programming they’re just airing hourlong lists with talking heads babbling – or “offering insight,” depending on your level of tolerance.

I couldn’t resist checking out their list, even though I knew I would be appalled by their selections. And yep, I was appalled – but certainly not in the manner I expected.

The artists up for consideration were required to have released their solo album in 1999 or later, so no Nas or Jay-Z or Missy Elliott allowed. The list was determined from 15 “finalists” selected by fans: Game, Ludacris, Drake, Nelly, Eminem, Jadakiss, Rick Ross, Eve, Kanye, T.I., Fabolous, Lil Wayne, Young Jeezy and, ugh, Gucci Mane. I have NO idea why Eve was in the running (was her TV show that good?), but whatever. I’m shocked they didn’t fudge the rules to shoehorn Nicki Minaj into the running. I don’t get the obsession with that woman.

The panel of judges ranged from DJs, producers, writers and bloggers. Guess my invitation was lost in the mail. Artists were ranked according to flow, lyrics, subject range, impact, money, and “digital swagger” – the hood term for Facebook friends, I suppose. If the panel couldn’t agree on a ranking there was a weird re-count system that resembled a game of Uno – I won’t even attempt to explain it.

After an hour of bickering, here’s what the panel decided:

10. Rick Ross

9. Jadakiss

8. Young Jeezy

7. Drake

6. Ludacris

5. T.I.

4. 50 Cent

3. Kanye West

2. Lil Wayne

1. Eminem

Actually, their list isn’t horrible. Putting aside personal preferences for guys like Jada and Fab, whom I love but lack the impact of others, here are my unbiased picks:

10. Game

9. Drake

8. Young Jeezy

7. T.I.

6. Nelly

5. Ludacris

4. 50 Cent

3. Lil Wayne

2. Eminem

1. Kanye West

I went with Kanye for the top spot because, with the slight exception of Wayne, he’s the only true trendsetter on the list. He sings auto-tune, everyone sings auto-tune. He starts wearing his little sister’s jeans, everyone starts wearing their little sister’s jeans. Plus he has the best overall body of work, despite THIS.

But there is one glaring omission from the experts’ list:

Yes, I’m defending Nelly. I keep it real, even when it hurts.

Please do not get me wrong. I despise Nelly. Although his success predated the birth of Georgia Mae, most of you could already guess that I’m not very fond of the guy. I hated his Mother Goose-sounding raps, I hated that he dated Ashanti, I hated that stupid Band-Aid he wore, I hated that he dated Ashanti – I could keep going but I don’t want to offend Ashanti.

Seriously, it’s pretty short-sighted to exclude an artist who has sold more than 20 million albums in the U.S. alone. Throw in international sales, and that’s slightly more than the Number 5-10 artists’ sales COMBINED. Sure he hasn’t done much lately but neither has 50, unless you count Internet beefs. Some of the panelists said Nelly’s lack of lyrical dexterity excluded him from the list. I certainly wouldn’t call Jeezy or Rawsssssse lyrical powerhouses, yet they made it.

Only panelist Jermaine Dupri seemed upset by Nelly’s exclusion but he didn’t have enough yellow Uno cards to re-count the hanging chads, or something.

A big problem with the industry is its refusal to look back and give past artists their due. We only live in the moment – which is why Rawsssssssse, who dropped an album this year, made the list over Game, who has way better songs and sales but hasn’t released anything lately. Out of sight, out of mind.

So today I reluctantly salute Nelly. Because of him, rappers are singing all over the radio and forcing their less-talented friends upon us. A true pioneer.

He even has new song. True to form, it’s wack. Ah Nelly, it’s like you never left.

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